Enable javascript in your browser for better experience. Need to know to enable it? Go here.
Blogs Banner

What have I learned from other women?

I am a feminist.

I have always been a feminist.

But I’m not sure I always fully understood feminism.


I happen to accidentally be surrounded by men most of my time. I don’t think there is any particular reason, I just usually get along better with the boys in my circles because we have similar interests and I feel safe among them. But I do think that this fact is actually a reason for my late understanding about feminism.


I remember myself back in my first year of university saying that it was ‘sad that women need a women’s day, because that means there is no equality between men and women’. Today, I go on strike and march proudly every March 8 because there is no such equality. Not everywhere at least. And this transformation has not been natural, but the result of a process influenced by the women around me.


In that context, I always had an idea of women being as capable as men for anything, and I preached my beliefs with my actions. I never felt less than any male around me. I never doubted how valuable I was professionally compared to my male colleagues. I would get into arguments when I thought I was being treated with sexist manners or being disrespected for my female condition. I defended myself from the sexist behavior against me when it happened.


I was a fighting woman, I was so sure of that.


But, what or who was I fighting for? 


 I think I was just fighting for myself alone.

And I was fighting alone too.


I wasn’t aware of sorority yet. 

I hadn’t felt sorority yet either.

The advantages of Sorority between women
The advantages of Sorority between women

In addition to my male companions, my female relationships have turned out to be difficult as a stigma of my life, especially when I was younger. It wasn’t until my mid-twenties, because of the people and the conversations around me, that I experienced awareness of sorority. I first watched it, from the outside, but then I experienced it. From me and towards me. I gradually changed my perception an I realized Icould fight my own fights because of the women who fought for me and the rest of women who fought before us. I opnened my eyes to the fact that I must fight for the women who can’t.

These two facts, beautifully simple: sorority and fighting for the women who can’t and the women who are to come, were the inflection point of my relationship with feminism, and I feel infinitely grateful to the women who carried me out along that road.


Of course I learnt many other things, and I focused my life and my behavior to embrace and preach my new beliefs, but I find both these lessons the most important pillars of my current self.


Also, I don’t think my learning about feminism is anywhere near the end. On the contrary, I feel like it is a constant learning path of life, where now I find myself open to being influenced by the women around me, and influence them too with my experiences and knowledge.


I’ve met a lot of strong women since then. 

I have influenced and been influenced by the women around me. 

I have walked beside them in difficult times. 

They have walked beside me in difficult times.


I believe that people can be good or mean regardless of their gender. 

I don’t love all women, as I don’t love all men. 


I think men and women need to fight together on this. 

We need to open our eyes and learn that nothing is without consequence. 


I will stand for and I will fight for any woman who is a victim, regardless of any relationship between her and me. 

I will fight for her even if we hate each other, because feminist sisterhood is beyond personal bounds or friendship.

It’s about us, women, as a collective.


I will point to the woman defending a man who hurt women too. But I will also know that the best way to fight that blindness starts in education, in bringing the knowledge of sorority to our kids, our girls, our women.

I have learned many things from women… but the most important for me is this: we must keep fighting against Patriarchy, and we must fight together. Because we are stronger when we are together.

Stronger Together 8M
Stronger Together 8M

Disclaimer: The statements and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author(s) and do not necessarily reflect the positions of Thoughtworks.

Keep up to date with our latest insights